Sunday, March 17, 2019

What's Up Wednesday #47 - A Bit of a Cynical Rant

This past week, I couldn't even get a Wednesday video up before the weekend! And it wasn't to do with my being so busy really, if I'm honest. It's more to do with my skin being SO red that I didn't want to show my face. I don't wear makeup, and believe it or not given all the videos I've done with my skin all red and rashy, it does actually embarrass me. But it's part of the process, isn't it? It's part of the healing process, to show the different cycles and stages my skin goes through, and how long it takes to fully heal. It's often one of the last symptoms to disappear for some of us, sadly.

Not having made a video for What's Up Wednesday really didn't fel right, so I gave in on Friday and filmed one - only to not be able to fully edit and complete it until Saturday - and here we are.

In the video I talk about how Taste Nirvana - the coconut water we were all drinking - changed its formula - it had been the ONLY pure coconut water in the US, the only one without stuff added to it - and they changed it! They claim it's because they kept getting complaints from people saying that the taste was inconsistent. Duh, really? It's coconut water, it comes from a coconut, and you're surprised about inconsistency? And they really got enough complaints that a whole company went to the expense to change their entire formula? I'm not buying that BS. I think it was more a matter of palms being greased and influencers saying you need to add this, stealing away our health little by little by adding MSG to a product they knew we were drinking almost daily. It's infuriating.

It was the ONLY one. So now if we want coconut water in the US, we have to use young thai coconuts, and then figure out something to do with the flesh inside too - I don't want to waste it but I won't eat it because of the fat. However, my family still eats a bit of fat, so I could make it into wraps and feed it to them. Or noodles. Oooh, I could blend it into sauces for them for creaminess....well, at least I already have a Coco Jack.

That's not all I talk about, there's another rant about finding a website designing platform that makes it relatively easy, yet is customizable, but also has really good blog support...I know you're going to say Wordpress but let me finish - and also doesn't get hacked on the regular. Wix and Squarespace both have great interface and features, and semi decent blog support, but you can't import a blog from anywhere else. Dealbreaker. Wordpress gets hacked too easily, and if something goes awry, it's on you, or rather me. Nope.

I actually did a third rant about the poor quality of the Canon Rebel EOS, but I deleted it from the video because it was just TOO much ranting, and rather unnecessary to a weekly healing uppdate....but I'll just say here if you are thinking of buying one for your YouTube channel, don't bother. I have so many reasons. It cuts off the videos every 10 minutes or so, really really poor battery life, feels flimsy, makes me miss my Nikon D70S (didn't take video but STILL WORKS) and my Pentax K1000 (film camera, also still works after 33 years, but obviously not usable for well, much of anything anymore).

Oh and yeah, I sort of did a healing update? I talked about my foods and my skin but got sidetracked by ranting. Well, it's got to come out sometimes, right? I guess today was one of those days. 

Monday, March 11, 2019

Why Celery Juice Is Healing Millions - and Me

This amazing video came out today from Medical Medium and a wonderful
friend texted me and said, "Hey, you're in this video!" What a gift!
I'm honored and humbled to be a part of anything that Medical Medium
does to get out more information about healing and what's possible.

Celery juice literally changed my life overnight. I mean it was subtle
and slow to the outward eye, but what happened inside of me was so
incredibly powerful and indisputable - I could literally feel my cells
waking up the first time I drank it - and my life has never been the
same since. I have embarked upon the most amazing journey of my life
because of it - my healing journey.

Going through this move, I've been
having some big emotional upheaval lately. Don't you find that moving
does that, just unearths some big stuff that's been buried deep? It does
for me, every time. Moves ALL of the dust, both physically and
metaphorically. I mean look at me, I'm writing a blog post for the first
time in forever! I miss typing my thoughts, I do!

I love making videos, but I also always loved blogging - writing in any
form. It uses a different part of the brain and taps into the creative
process in a distinct way. I always did love that. I really want to
get back to doing it - maybe have an accompanying post for each video.
It won't say quite the same thing, but maybe on the topic, you know?

 I bring up the emotional upheaval because of the synchronicity of this
video being posted with me in it. When I say "emotional upheaval" I
mean, I was questioning my place on this planet altogether, and feeling
like I had none. I was in full on loss of self-compassion, in
self-flagellation, feeling like I didn't belong and WTF am I even doing
here mode.

It's scary when that happens. 

For one, I used to live in that state -
when I was fully chronically ill, in the height of all of my pain and
sickness, receiving diagnosis after diagnosis, I lived in a constant
state of depression, of feeling like I had no place on this planet, of
feeling useless and trapped and the deepest sadness and pain. So if ever
that feeling/experience happens NOW, in my current state of healing, it
can also trigger a PTSD experience of fear that "it's back", which is
equally terrifying. 

 Let me say, however, that in my healing journey, those experiences have
been further and further between, with SO MUCH faster a recovery time
when they happen. For that, I am so incredibly grateful. And they happen
so infrequently that it is a complete surprise to have that feeling
again - which is what happened for the past few days. 

Now, let me say that I had been eating fully raw for about three weeks,
and fully raw can be powerfully cleansing. Then on March 5th Mercury
went into Retrograde. Without getting too much into it, I'll just say
that it can have an effect on emotions as well, resulting in a "wearing
of emotions on your sleeve" occurrence. Those two put together - about
four days ago I was just feeling ALL the feels, and it was just coming
up big for me. SO much emotion - stuff from high school, it was crazy

 I think I had a thought about it being the cleansing and wanting to
slow it down, so I ate some steamed veggies in that vain. And then I
just kept having the big emotions coming up, so each day I'd be eating
some steamed veggies again. But then that turned into using it against
myself, and yesterday I just had myself spiraling hard. So hard. Rather
than seeing that these emotions were coming up to be witnessed and
healed, as Matt Kahn teaches (I love him), I just saw them as a failing
on my part and it spiraled from there.

And last night I went to sleep just in the darkest part of it, wondering
why I am on this planet at all. 

 Today my friend texts me that I'm in this video, and you might think
that's such a small thing, why would that be anything, why would that
bring you out to the other side? Well, this video reminds me what I am
doing here, what I've been doing for the past 33 months, and why I make
YouTube videos of my own. Healing. Helping others find their healing,
helping them know that they aren't alone on this healing journey. It
matters. It matters to me, and it matters to the millions of people out
there who are afflicted with chronic illness and are living in that
darkness and without hope.

I am again reminded, as I said to myself before sleep last night,
that this too shall pass, and I WILL come out the other side, and hope
always finds me again, even if it doesn't feel like it now. (Last
night). And the funny thing is, there are certain ways the Universe
seems to find to give me these reminders. Anthony William, the Medical
Medium, is one of them. There have been times when I've felt this way
and during those times, it was like he always knew just when to reach
out to me - he'd like a post I made on Instagram or leave a positive
comment or post a blog post or a video that seemed to speak just to me
(and probably thousands of other people). 

Now, he didn't make this video himself, I know that. On top of writing
book after book and helping millions of people heal, do I also think
that he has time to learn video production and do all of that himself? I
don't know, maybe. I do know that he is WAY too busy trying to heal the
world from chronic illness in any way he can to just be focused on me.
But what I do know is that the Universe seems to like to use him to
reach me whenever I seem to be in darkness. By timing it just right that
this video was posted just when I needed to see it, and be reminded of
my own light.

And it is because of my healing process that I am able to see these
events more clearly and have deep gratitude for what they are. I'm not a
bad person. I do have my place in this world even if I don't always
know what it is or temporarily lose sight of it. I haven't "Failed" just
because I didn't live up to some high expectation I have for myself of
what an "example" should look like, or even what my own healing "should"
look like.

 Big emotions are coming up. I need to witness and hold them and send
them love and transmute them into light (this may only make sense if you
have heard Matt Kahn's work, I apologize for that). They are like
babies wanting love and attention. A reflection of my own inner child
and what needs to be healed. It's okay for me to not want to feel their
bigness and intensity - that's my own humanness too. I can send that
love as well. But now, seeing them for what they are, I can do that for

Today is a new day - the sun is out, the birds have been coming by the
balcony again, the snow is beginning to melt. Spring is coming, you can
feel it and see evidence of it everywhere. And maybe this emotional
purge is my own snow melting to make way for new growth and experiences
as well.

Thursday, October 25, 2018

Throw Back Thursday - Halloween Edition

I am a huge fan of Halloween. I think I like it so much because we get to dress in costumes, and I just LOVE costumes. Costumes, cosplay, Halloween....any excuse to get out my sewing machine and show my skills, and have some fun. Dress me up!

I don't have the mad costuming skills some of my friends have - friends who are actually professional costumers, and even have degrees in costuming - but I can hold my own, and I'm generally pretty proud of what I manage to come up with.

These are some of the costumes I've created in the past:

Steampunk Airship Pirate

Steampunk Airship Pirate (note: I did NOT make the corset. Just everything else).

Steampunk Airship Pirates

Lightning McQueen made completely from scratch

He was happy to wear it even though it was a bit heavy.

Sonic the Hedgehog (I didn't make the headpiece, just everything else.)

Quick Renaissance garb from pirate wear.

Old skool Robin (the taller one, natch)

This was a dress I made myself for New Year's Eve one year.

Arrr! A pirate!

We be pirates!

The Honey Tree and Owl (from Winnie-the-Pooh).

It was a group theme costume - the kids were Winnie-the-Pooh, Tigger, Piglet and Christopher Robin. They were adorable!

One year we did Charmander when the kiddo was particularly into PokΓ©mon. He was pretty knackered in the second photo after trick-or-treating through the mall in a warm costume.

This one is the piece de resistance. I sculpted this Freddy Fazbear Costume from foam, a medium I had never worked in before. The jaw moved and everything. It wasn't easy to move in, but he wanted to do it. 

I am so crazy proud of this costume. I even made a video of the making of it:

Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Marinated Mushrooms [Recipe][Medical Medium Healing]

Recipe for Marinated Mushrooms!
(Printable Recipe Here
1 or 2 packages of mushrooms, sliced - I used baby bellas, but you could use button, whatever you like
Juice of 1 lime
1/4-1/3 cup Coconut aminos
1-2 Tbs Maple syrup
1/2tsp ea:
Curry powder
Chili powder
Garlic powder
Onion powder
. πŸ„πŸ„πŸ„
Place all in large bowl and stir to coat all mushroom pieces. Now the next step I like to do, but it's not necessary, you can just let the mushrooms marinate for an hour or two of you like. OR you can spread them on a dehydrator sheet and dehydrate them for an hour or two. I use half this mix (one package total) per bowl of #MMspinachsoup, but you do you, boo. Whatever you like. πŸœπŸ„πŸœ These are also amazing in salads, atop cucumber noodles, on potatoes, in sauces... Enjoy!

Sunday, June 17, 2018

Vegan Cashew "Mozz" Chz for Pizza [Recipe]

I've modified this recipe from Advanced Lifestyle Medicine - I don't use nutritional yeast as it contains MSG according to Medical Medium. 

He talks about it in his SoundCloud show, "The Healing Powers of Wild Foods"

Also in his  radio show, "Streptococcus Revealed

He also talks about the healing power of cashews in his blog here

And so, on to the recipe!

Vegan Cashew "Mozz" Chz for Pizza (medicalmedium, plant-based, vegan)

1/2 cup raw cashews
2 cups of hot water
5 Tablespoons of tapioca flour

1 tsp chili powder
1/2 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp turmeric powder
2 teaspoons of sea salt
2 teaspoons fresh lemon juice 

1. Wash the cashews and soak in water for at least an hour or longer
2. Put all ingredients into a high speed blender and blend for about a minute until creamy.

3. Pour the blended cashew mixture into a small saucepan and cook, stirring constantly over medium heat until the mixture thickens and looks like melted cheese. 
4. Let cool slightly and spread over the tomato sauce on your pizza. 
5. Continue with the Pizza recipe.