My Healing Journey with Medical Medium

It's been almost 19 months now that I've been on this healing journey using the Medical Medium protocols. I finally made a video of my full story - well, most of it. At least fully how I got so sick and chronically ill, and how I found Medical Medium and began to recover my life. 

I'm so grateful every day for this healing. I've learned SO much about how I got sick, what my triggers were that kicked these viruses and bacteria into high gear in my body, what these viruses are, how foods heal or harm us, and so so much more. And knowing all of this is helping me heal. The more I understand, the more I am able  to get to it and give my body the tools it needs to do what it's been trying to do my whole life - reach homeostasis and optimal health.

I'm still going, getting stronger every day, seeing the changes in myself both physically and emotionally, that are ultimately getting me to my best health. 

Post Holiday Victorycheck - Thank You Medical Medium!

I'm trying to decide how to do these posts that include a video. Should I write a short synopsis of what you will see in the video as well, talk about it some? Or should I just let the video speak for itself? What do you think?

MCAD and High Histamine Foods on the Medical Medium Protocol

Three Steps Forward, Two Steps Back...One Step Forward Again

Sure enough, once we moved to the new RV Park, within just a couple of hours I was already feeling so much better and less pain. And after being here a couple of days now, still maintaining that improvement. Pain in my body is almost gone really, and fatigue as well. I do keep waking up with a headache, but it does also mostly go away once I've been awake awhile. I'm not sure exactly what that's about.

It's been raining here nonstop and that affects me differently, but not nearly as adversely as those power lines. I just get a little more tired and sleepy and want to snuggle under blankets and have much less humidity in the air. But I'm functional. 

I had an amazing day visiting my family yesterday - a day that makes me wish hard that our time in this city could be for longer than it is. It feels SO short this time. It's been several years since we've all seen each other and there is so much to catch up on. Would that we could be here a month so we could really start to tackle it.

I still have many limitations that prevent me from being able to see all the people I wish I could see here. People have to make changes to see me - they have to be scent-free and willing to come to us in the RV park, because other than my Mom's house I'm not sure where I could be safe. I have to be extra super careful about what I eat and making sure to take all of my supplements (and getting in extra) so my immune system can handle all the stress of new and different situations.

Traveling while healing and detoxing is not exactly ideal, but it is doable if I just make sure to prioritize my health and really be careful about listening to my body's needs and taking care of them.

Before when we've visited the way we would handle being able to see many people at once is we'd have a gathering somewhere - usually a kind friend would offer their home or we'd meet at a park or something, and invite friends to come, so we could have a time of seeing them. But my body cannot handle that this time - there are too many variables that could happen in a group (like scents and colds and such), and for my health I just cannot do that anymore.

I'd like to think there will come a time when I will be able to again. Once I've healed enough to have reached a stable space and be back in the world safely and fully again. I have real hope that it will happen in time.

Until then I am mindful, paying attention, making sure I'm eating the most healing foods (as outlined by Anthony William in his books, "Medical Medium" and "Life-Changing Foods", as well as in his blogs and podcasts). I'm eating lots of raw, since my body seems its best with that - and potatoes at night. I drink my celery juice and heavy metal detox smoothie every morning, along with my supplements and herbal tinctures. I don't think I've ever been SO diligent about making sure everything that goes in has a healing purpose since I did the Medical Medium cleanse. And that was just the foods, no supplements then.

But it's important - this is how I get through all of this okay and continuing to heal. I couldn't have done this at all a year ago. I am so grateful for all of the healing information I DO have now thanks to the Medical Medium, because it has gotten me this far. Being able to travel at all. Being able to see my family again. Having days like yesterday with laughter, love, family, it meant everything to me.

A year ago I wasn't sure I'd ever even be able to see my family again. I'd lost hope that I'd ever find healing or get better or be able to leave my house safely again. So to be able to do all of those things with some accommodations (everyone was scent-free for me) has been a gift I'm eternally grateful for.

Photos to come in a couple of weeks, once they've been processed. 

Ten Months In - What Has Medical Medium Done for me Lately?: Part 3: The Update

Part 1 of this story is here.
Part 2 of this story is here.
Now it’s almost 10 months later, so what do I have to report?
~ A general lessening of my anxiety. I can make phone calls and sometimes talk to strangers and on occasion I’ve even ventured out into the world by myself. I’m still working on that, I think I have a lot to recover from that needs addressing. But it’s huge progress.

~ My depression has lifted. It used to be like a dark cloud hung over everything  - all of my thoughts would spiral to dark and negative thinking, and there was just so much “what’s the point” attached to everything. Now I feel as a baseline, a general sense of hopefulness and like things will be okay. I feel like I CAN do things rather than that they are so overwhelming.

~ I have had actual entire pain-free days. WHOLE pain-free days. That is….it’s HUGE. It’s nothing short of a miracle. I’ve been able to sit and stand and walk and move around, and though my lower back is still an issue for me, there have been days where it actually wasn’t. It blew my mind.

~ I haven’t needed any sort of pain relief medication other than Ibuprofen for a migraine in months. I used to use medical marijuana tinctures if I needed relief because of my narcotics allergy, but I haven’t needed them at all.
~ For a long time I was taking Low Dose Naltrexone - the only medication I didn’t react to - to take the edge off mf my Fibromyalgia pain. Just to take the edge off. I still had the pain. But it made the pain liveable. By some snafu a couple of months into being on this path, I forgot to have my prescription refilled and was without them for a full week. And I noticed that the edge did NOT come back. Before if I didn’t take them for a DAY I would feel it, I needed that LDN. But a whole week and it felt like it always did. So I never got that refill. And I never needed anything else, either.

~ The itching. It used so be all the time randomly I would get itching. Mostly on my back, but also on other areas of my body. I bought a back scratcher and used it daily, multiple times a day. Now I still have itching on my back at times, but I can go days without touching my back scratcher sometimes. That never happened before.

~ My hair isn’t falling out anymore.

~ I’ve had more stamina to do things when I am able. I can go for walks sometimes, and we’ve been swimming a lot since we’ve been in the RV park we’ve been in, which has been great for me.

~ Speaking of swimming, I can get in a chlorinated pool and not have an all over body reaction and itch fest. I still make sure and shower immediately afterwards, but I’ve been swimming a bunch of times and have been okay. I couldn’t even be in a room with a chlorinated pool before. I’d have a reaction to the chlorine.

~ I just added another Magnesium supplement to my regimen - Pure encapsulations Mag Glycinate. My sleep has been AMAZING since adding it. It had improved greatly with everything else, but MG took it to a whole new level. I’m sure it’s doing other things, too, but that is definitely the most noticeable.

~ My skin. I have battled with rosacea and more recently, acne, for SO many years. And even until recently, I kept having flares and breakouts. But as my diet has gotten cleaner and cleaner, my skin is following suit. Since the skin is a reflection of what is happening in the liver, that means my liver is FINALLY getting cleaned out, which makes me SO happy! That means that pretty soon I can watch this fat start melting away.

~ The fat has already started melting away. I wish I could say how much, but I really don’t know, as I stopped using a scale a long time ago. But my clothes are getting looser, and I can see things on my body shifting and changing. And I know what my body feels like when it is losing weight.
~ The haze in my vision has left the building.

~ I can’t remember the last time I had flaky eyebrows.

~ Almost no migraines. I’ve had one or two in the last couple of months, triggered by unusual lack of sleep and stress. But generally I just don’t get them anymore. It helps greatly that I have learned what all of my triggers are and I actively avoid them, but even when I hit an inadvertent trigger, it’s been so much better.

~ Eating so many foods I thought I’d lost forever. I could write a whole post on this, I think, but I’ll try to keep it brief. Eating GAPs, then Paleo, then GF/CF, then Paleo again, then Autoimmune Paleo, then AIP with low FODMAPS. All that did was clog up my liver and make me sicker. I lost more and more foods and watched others have the same experience. But letting go of the meat and fats and eggs and eating as many raw fruits and veggies and even some lightly cooked veggies as possible, has given me back foods I thought I’d lost forever. Nightshades! I can eat them all again! I still prefer tomatoes and peppers raw to cooked, but potatoes I eat with wild abandon, and mushrooms! Oh, my precious mushrooms have come back to me. Fruits I reacted to before like pineapple, citrus and kiwi! I eat them. All of them. Celery juice every morning is restoring my digestion, and eating other healing foods as well is giving me the ability to eat more healing foods. It’s a win win!

~ My digestion is better - if I do get gas, I know it's a food I'm not ready for, because if I'm eating properly for my body, there's no gas. I'll spare you the details of the other ways I know. But it's better. I can tell that I'm absorbing the nutrients from the foods and supplements I'm taking and not just making super expensive urine, as has happened in the past from malabsorption.

~ I've been tracking my urinary frequency and BM frequency with an app on my phone, and things have greatly settled down in that department. Not such a ridiculous number of times a day anymore. That's pretty awesome!

Since I did the cleanse, my son has also started on a regimen of supplements and I’ve slowly been adjusting the food he eats to contain more of the healing foods as I just stopped having any “no” foods available.
He no longer has nightmares.

He had a stutter which has gone away  - this came with the addition of the Heavy Metals Detox Smoothie and a Zeolite supplement called “ACZ Nano”.

He has less panic.

He is more able to have his anxiety and still “do the thing”. Before his anxiety would be too overwhelming and he would go into a panic attack.

He has been able to make and play with friends online in a group, which was not something he could do before. One on one was all he could handle.

This doesn’t mean that all of my symptoms have miraculously gone, or that I don’t have the occasional flare of my symptoms. I do. But I have noticed that when there IS a flare, it’s never been as bad as it was every day of my life before I started down this path. And I always have secure knowledge that when it happens, it’s only temporary, which is a huge about-face from how it was before.

Before, a recurrence of symptoms was filled with dread and panic, because “OMG it’s all coming back it will never  leave I am never going to get better this is my life now AAAAUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!”

But now I know that it’s just a bump in the road, and that my healing continues as long as I eat the healing foods and take my supplements - it’s a certainty. A bout of strep or a flu isn’t going to take us back to where we were, chronically ill and in pain every day and unable to move or do anything. It’s just a temporary thing, and will pass, as our bodies get stronger and more able to fight them off for longer periods.

I still have a lot of healing to do. My body is deconditioned by years of chronic pain and fatigue. I have strength to build. My liver needs cleansing to be able to fully release all the extra fat I carry, and I’ll need to build my strength and stamina to be able to exercise to tone and condition my body.

But now I can. I know that it’s  a possibility now, where it never really felt like it could be before - not for many many years now.
I’m back in life again. I’m able to be with my family. We travel in the RV. We explore together. We go on adventures together. I take my dog for walks sometimes, when I’m able. I’m able to more and more. I go for walks with my family. Soon I’ll be able to hike again. It just keeps improving now, things just keep getting better and better.
If you're interested in reading the Medical Medium book, it can be purchased here. 

Ten Months In - What Has Medical Medium Done for me Lately?: Part 2: The Cleanse

Part 1 of this story is here.
Let’s recap the Medical Medium cleanse that I did back in June of 2016, shall we?

Day 1: Energy I'd never had before. Miracle level energy. Enough energy to prepare myself the juice, smoothies, and foods for the cleanse. I'm not even doing the full cleanse yet, because I eat lamb for dinner, and apple cider vinegar. But I'm "buzzing". I have this "alive" feeling in my cells I'm not used to. My mood feels lighter, I feel alert and clear-headed.

Day 2: Again with the alive, buzzing feeling after drinking the celery juice. I notice the edema in my feet is so much less that my feet just look like regular feet. I also notice my mood is lighter still and I feel pretty good. I want to get up and do things. I took the dog out without exhaustion afterward. I go outside twice today and can walk all around the yard. Usually I can't go very far, only a little way. This is blowing my mind.

Day 3: I'm able to do chores around the house and some cleaning. I'm able to be present with my son and engage with him. I do laundry, clean the kitchen, make the bed. No exhaustion afterward. Still no edema in my feet. No swelling. I feel amazing, and it's only been THREE days.

Day 4: Noticing that non-cleanse foods make me feel less great. Still feeling amazing with no edema. Still clear, energetic.

Day 5: Husband colored my hair with henna and I didn't react to the strong smell. Slight edema, but the weather has been very hot. Vision less hazy. Eyebrows less flaky. Feeling clear, lucid, present, like brain is back online. Less itching all over body. Feeling hope for the first time in years!

Day 6: Sleeping better. Less bothered by the heat. Feeling more rested after sleep. Feeling alive and clearer and hopeful. Showering again because I CAN now. Wanting to get dressed in the mornings rather than just live in pajamas. HUGE.

Day 7: Spiritual cleansing. By which I mean I had an experience at night that I can only describe as spiritual cleansing. As I am at a loss to adequately sum it up, you’re welcome to read about it by clicking the link to the post.

Day 8: Needing rest, but still enough energy to make all the food. Still way more energy than before, just feeling the need for rest and self-care.

Day 9: Barometric pressure change which usually takes me out - I feel it, but less so than usual. Brain isn't going to worst case scenario when confronted. Able to seek solutions rather than more problems. Fibromyalgia pain less.

Day 12: Standing and walking a lot, still have energy, no pain except in back, sleepy but not exhausted/drained at end of day.

Day 13: Have not had any POTS or Dysautonomia symptoms since starting this cleanse - I can bend over and stand up quickly and I feel the same - I can do these things without feeling faint! Whoa. Also no weird heart palpitations. What???

Day 14: Added dulse, had strong mast cell reaction. Added cooked sweet potatoes to slow down cleanse.

Day 15: Energy returning, clear head, body odor decreasing (not that I stank, but just normal level decreasing).

Day 16: Anxiety had been subsiding, but triggering event brought it back. Barometric changes causing pain and inflammation in body. Tried spirulina, too much detox, decided not to do heavy metals cleanse until later when more healing has happened.

Day 17: Huge stressful situation did NOT cause flare as it would have in the past. Anxiety level lower than expected given the situation at the time.

Day 20: I'm feeling stronger and happier, I'm more easily able to get through things, I seem to be reacting much less to things that usually trigger me. My skin seems to be getting clearer by the day. Dare I hope!

Day 21: I'm feeling so much more positive, despite massive amounts of stress being heaped upon our lives right now. It's going to be worked out, right? The angels say yes.

Day 22: Mast cell reaction to adrenaline and stress.

Day 24: Stressful situation broke with support and prayers. Back pain lessening, so much relief from stress.

Day 26: Was able to go to scented building without mask. Did yard work. Got a bit stiff from being deconditioned, but still felt good.

Day 28: Just the beginning.

So a summary of my results from the 28 Day cleanse :

~ The swelling in my feet has gone down significantly.

~ I have actual energy to do things in my day.

~ I'm getting stronger and stronger.

~ There is less pain in my back.

~ I can stand for longer periods of time, and walk for longer.

~ I can leave the house without a mask - that is huge.

~ Leaving the house doesn't mean days of recovery afterward.

~ My anxiety levels have dropped so significantly I feel like I can function again (make phone calls, meet with people, make plans outside of my house).

~ I am able to do some level of physical labor, like working in the yard.

~ My brain fog has lessened dramatically.

~ I can bend over and do things much more, without feeling my heart race and my BP change.

~ I am present with my family again.

~ I have been able to do physical things to contribute to my family again.

~ I feel hopeful.

~ I've been much much more positive and upbeat in general.

~ I've been a lot less moody and irritable.

~ My son is excited because now we can plan things like going to the beach and to festivals.

And that was just the first 28 days.
If you're interested in reading the Medical Medium book, it can be purchased here. 

Continue reading Ten Months In - What Has Medical Medium Done for me Lately?: Part 3: The Update

Ten Months In - What Has Medical Medium Done for me Lately?: Part 1: The Diseases

Oh right, remember how back on May 31, 2016, I posted about starting this 28 day Medical Medium cleanse? And how I decided to document it around Day 3, because miracles were happening, and I wanted to document so I wouldn't forget? And then occasionally here and there I'd make a sort of offhand reference to what had been happening, but really for the most part I haven't said much about it since? Yeah, me too.

I've been painfully aware of how much I HAVEN'T been posting about all of the amazing healing happening in my life as I've gone through this process.  I wanted to be, because my life is so completely different now to May 31st, 2016.  Not just because we live in an RV and travel around the country. Because of my healing! I am slowly becoming a part of the world again, and that, my friends, is a HUGE miracle.

Let us recap. When I started this journey, my diagnosis list and symptoms were long. If you want the refresher, the list is:
~ Mast Cell Activation Disorder (MCAD) which included red rashes on face/chest/body when exposed to allergens: petrochemicals, perfumes, exhaust fumes, gasoline, mold, pollens, grasses, smoke, strong emotions, hot sun, foods I am intolerant to, fluorescent lights. There is the possibility of anaphylaxis every time one of these exposures happens. I became homebound partially because of reactions I had every time I left the house.

~ Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS) which is a connective tissue disorder causing many subluxations in my body when sitting, standing, lying down, bending over, existing. Also caused hyperflexibility for a time. Caused weak ankles and a few fractures and a break, both ankles at different times. EDS can cause heart and brain issues and the need for surgeries. I cannot hold myself upright on my own when sitting or standing. It causes SO much pain. I began to need a wheelchair to go anywhere because of my inability to hold myself up to stand or walk. EDS requires a lot of PT to help manage the symptoms and function.

~ Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) (now renamed Systemic Exertion Intolerance Disorder (SEID)) which has the lovely effect of no energy to do anything ever, even shower, make food, or do dishes or a load of laundry. I “run out of gas” ridiculously easily. I can push myself to do “a thing” but then will pay for days afterward with flare of symptoms (exhaustion, pain, brain fog, need for wheelchair but too tired to be able to go out and make use of it), so am often homebound.

~ Fibromyalgia  which causes pain in random spots all over my body, fatigue, and brain fog. As a result, I am very sensitive to touch, which also makes me irritable and angry. Again, because of the pain I have need for a wheelchair to get around.

~ Obstructive Sleep Apnea which is multiple bouts of stopping breathing throughout the night, causing multiple sleep disruptions and inability to sleep, insomnia, and the need for CPAP machine to essentially breathe for me as I sleep.

~ Bursitis which is pain in my hips not alleviated by sitting, standing, lying down. I cannot lie on my side at all anymore from pain.

~ Arthritis in my neck and lower back. It causes pain and tightness and contributes to my need for a wheelchair.

~ Dysautonomia / Post Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS) which is the inability of my body to properly regulate blood pressure. My BP jumps too high to too low when going from standing to sitting and vice-versa. POTS can cause fainting, dizziness, light-headedness, heart palpitations, racing heart, and exercise intolerance. It also causes third spacing, which is edema in my feet and ankles, sometimes so bad my ankles would look like grapefruit, necessitating the need for compression socks all the time. My doctor actually wanted me to wear compression clothing, but they don’t make it in my size.

~ Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) which in my case is another part of not being able to leave my home. It also manifests in an inability to make phone calls or decisions or speak to strangers, including doctors. It interferes with my ability to self-advocate, causes fears that no one likes me or wants me around, causes other random fear, doomsday thinking, and spiraling dark thoughts.

~ Depression which for me looks like apathy, no desire to do anything, no joy, no hope.

~ Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) (see Anxiety, because which is Anxiety and which is PTSD - they have a lot of the same symptoms). I become easily triggered and so easily sent back into replaying things that haunt me, like the death of my first son and other things I'm not going to go into.

~ Hypothyroid which basically manifests as my being really fat and unable to lose weight no matter what I do - which because of the huge fatigue isn’t much in the way of exercise, but no matter what I eat. I also react to every medication they’ve prescribed me for it. Hair loss is also an issue.

~ Degenerative Disc Disorder (DDD) which is pain in my lower back 24/7. It’s not alleviated by drugs, chiropractic, acupuncture, massage, etc. Just all pain all the time, since I was in my 20s.

~ Migraines which are caused by exposure to: gluten, dairy, fluorescent lights, LEDs, CFLs, flashing lights, strong scents, refined sugar or other artificial sweeteners, processed foods, nitrates, alcohol, corn, soy, MSG, food dyes, exhaust, smoke, lack of sleep, strong emotions, hot sun, physical activity, hormones, weather changes, hunger, bright lights, food additives, perfume, petrochemicals, mold, etc.

~ Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) or Post Concussive Syndrome which includes but is not limited to brain fog, short-term memory loss, inability to think on my feet, lack of recall of simple words, inability to multitask, inability to process things immediately, mood swings, irritability, difficulty concentrating, difficulty or inability to read books, inability to recreate what I just read or saw. Also great difficulty putting faces with names or even remembering the names of people I know well.

~ Poly Cystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) which can cause cycts and pain in my ovaries, weight gain, fatigue, headaches, and sleep issues.

~ Tinnitus which is that my ears are always ringing. I can also hear store alarms and sometimes even other radio frequencies or EMFs.  

~ Rosacea, which is just a lovely way of saying my face always looks like someone punched me and then colored me in with blotchy red marker. It would itch and sometimes even hurt and look terrible, adding to my high level of social anxiety.

Then there's the stuff I don't know where to put like hazy vision, flaky eyebrows, and random itching all over my body.  Honestly there are probably symptoms I am forgetting. When the list is that long, there always are. But we'll call this the basics.

I had prescriptions for over a dozen medications, which I had to have compounded because of reactions to fillers, but still I reacted to all but one of them. I have braces for my hand and my hips, a wheelchair and compression socks. I was supposed to wear compression everything, but they don't make anything but the socks in my size. I need my husband to push my wheelchair when I go out because I am not strong enough, plus the POTS, CFS, and EDS make it pretty impossible to propel myself.

And that, friends, is my list of what has happened to my body over time.

If you're interested in reading the Medical Medium book, it can be purchased here. 

Continue reading Ten Months In - What Has Medical Medium Done for me Lately?: Part 2: The Cleanse

Universal Studios Hollywood - Spoonie Perspective

The good thing is that my son had a (mostly) good time the first time we went, particularly in the Simpsons and Minionsareas. But it was super crowded, they do not ever ask people to make way for wheelchairs or other differently abled humans, they pump in scents everywhere (I could NOT take off my mask even outside). I didn't see it the first time we went because my husband dropped us off at the front, but the second time we went, I noticed this at the tollbooth for parking. In California (and I love this) Prop 65 requires anyone using toxic chemicals to post this warning. 

 Every shop smelled like "cake" (no food being sold in them though), and outside and inside everywhere else smelled like fabric softener. We didn't go into most of the shops or restaurants. I thought I was going to see the inside of Hogwarts, but all I got to see was all the ways Universal is scheming to take even more money from people. Because charging $119 per person per day isn't enough somehow. This place was a chronically ill human's nightmare. I'm glad my son had a good time, though. 

 I think if one really makes an effort to go on a less crowded day it would be slightly better. But according to Google, less crowded only happens if you get there at 8 AM, which we just weren't willing to try and do when it already makes for such a long day even being in the park. Also bear in mind that in a wheelchair I'm about crotch height to overyone else and it really does make it a lot worse for me. Even with my mask, the petrochemical scents overwhelm my nervous system and cause brain fog, anxiety and general overwhelm, not to mention physical symptoms like pain. 

We did go back a second time to try and get our money's worth out of the tickets. Having the wheelchair does bump you up in the lines for the rides - even if the wheelchair user doesn't go on the rides, members of their party can still go through the wheelchair part of the line and just wait at the exit for them, which makes it easier because not as much waiting around, which also drains energy resources. (Spoons). But trying to push a wheelchair through the crowds is rather brutal. ESPECIALLY over cobblestone. People don't necessarily move out of your way or let you through, and they will even do things like run in front of you if they see space. 

The first time we went, we made some rookie mistakes - partly because my nervous system was so overwhelmed, my brain forgot to tell my body it had needs other than "shut down", or "escape this nightmare". Among them, that were correctable the second time, were:

1. Not checking the busy times on Google first. ApparentlyMondays (the first time we went) are a super busy time, but also so are any days around the holiday. So we were kind of SOL there. 
2. Not having a hat with a visor. When the sun is high, it's brutal and shines in your eyes, making it unpleasant. They seem to know this and sell baseball hats and other hats with brims at every gift shop, but BYO is so much cheaper. Which we of course did the second time. 
3. Staying too long. We just wanted to see so much, and I think for our first day we just stayed longer than was good. The second time we didn't stay as long, but we also didn't get to do but one ride. This was largely due to an accident (that's all you'll get from me on that -  everyone is fine) that cut our visit short (but the whole visit was still beyond overwhelming). 
4. Not eating regularly enough. This is for me personally. I need an infusion of fruit and greens (lettuce, celery, whatever) every hour or hour and a half. I've posted about the 16 adrenal snacks before, and I REALLY need to be eating those on the regular. I only ate once in the 3-4 hours we were there, and it was not enough. I did better the second time, makind sure to eat the adrenal snack rather than just a piece of fruit. It makes a difference, believe me. 
5. I also should have been drinking ALL the liquids I brought (lemon water) instead of practically forgetting I'd brought any. The second time I did way better on this. 
6. Also, extra supplements like B12, which I did bring but forgot to use - because B12 gets depleted really quickly when the nervous system is under stress. The second time I literally set alarms on my phone for all of this and FOLLOWED THEM. If I am properly supported nutritionally, I do MUCH better. At home this is so much easier, of course. I need to learn how to do it outside of my home now. Bringing the food/drinks/supplements isn't enough, I have to actually ingest them. This is a learning process.

The scents aren't anything I can change, so I still very much needed to wear the mask to be there. Even my husband said that the shops "smelled like cake" when there was no cake anywhere, and the rest of the place "smelled like fabric softener" so even Muggles can smell this stuff around. I wish when they have the toxic chemical warning at the tollbooth that they would also have a list of what chemicals are used, so you know what you're getting into. Had I had my wits about me, I'd have asked. I wonder if they are required to have a list? If you know, please comment and tell me.

Today I'm okay again with the help of a lot of cleansing foods and supplemental support. I don't want to gloss over what hapened, because it was a big deal, and I SO wish Universal would have "sensory sensitive days" without all of the extra sensory input or scents, because everything was VERY LOUD (one might even do well to have a pair of earplugs to help filter it out, too). It  wasn't the crowds so much as the loud music playing everywhere  - the noise of the park itself - and there was nowhere to go to get away from it. Or the scents.

I am not at all used to going out into crowds anymore, having been homebound for the past couple of years, and at the most going to a quiet grocery store with almost no people in it, or a Target, which is about as busy a situation as I've been in. So that bears mentioning as well. Someone more accustomed to crowds might fare better.

Achievement Unlocked! Grocery Store Victory Check!

I've been experimenting with leaving the house more - trying to go out and see what I can tolerate, how long I can stand for, testing what I can do outside of my home. It's been such a long time being only in my home and staying away from everything everywhere for fear of exposure (and the reactions that follow). I had so little energy I couldn't get off of the sofa, let alone run an errand.

But now I'm getting my strength back and I want to see what I can do. I've been going to run some errands when my husband goes - little things like going to the grocery store - I KNOW I'm not ready for places like the mall or most big box stores. But I can walk the Farmers' Market. And the grocery stores we shop at are all or mostly organic, so it's much safer there. I'll always go with my husband just in case something really doesn't work, he can take care of things and make sure I get home safely.

Well, today I was out of both lettuce AND frozen wild blueberries - two staples in our household, these are foods I eat every day. Anthony William, Medical Medium, has this to say about wild blueberries: 

All fruits have incredible healing and energizing properties, but wild blueberries are the most phenomenal of them all. 
Wild blueberries are loaded with antioxidants, vitamins, and minerals. These sweet and satisfying berries are excellent liver and blood cleansers, and are vital to the health of eyes and the digestive tract.
Wild blueberries also have the ability to repair tissues and cells and keep the immune system strong. They are a powerhouse food not to be missed!

Wild blueberries also help remove heavy metals from the body, in conjunction with cilantro, dulse, Hawaiian spirulina and barley grass juice powder.  And part of my healing is getting those heavy metals out - slowly and gently, so as not to cause detox reactions in my still very sensitive system. So every day after my celery juice and B12, I have a Heavy Metal Detox Smoothie. I always keep a supply of all of the ingredients on hand, since I have this every morning.

But today I had everything in the VitaMix ready to go and when I went to get the frozen wild blueberries to add, I discovered (gasp!) that we were out. Dun dun duuunnnn!!!

Usually my husband does the grocery shopping, at least since I got too sick to do it myself. I've gone with him a couple of times recently, but it's been over a year since I've even considered doing a trip to the grocery store without another adult along just in case. But....my smoothie. And I HAVE gone recently to the grocery store WITH him and that went all right. I thought, "Maybe I can do this."

So I got ready, got my son, and we went. To the grocery store. With ME as the only adult! AND I didn't use the scooter, although I probably should have - the store we went to was larger than I'm able to walk, and the floors are cement, which is NOT friendly to my back pain. But I DID do it, and I even picked up a few other things we needed, AND managed to bring in all the groceries as well.

I didn't put them all away yet, but I DID do the dishes and made food for myself and my son, so that's still a LOT that I did today. And a huge #victorycheck for me, because holy moly, I ran an errand as the only adult, and it was a BIG deal. Before today, my anxiety and PTSD wouldn't have allowed that, let alone my physical body. It was amazing.

I did learn not to be too ambitious and to let myself use the scooter - that particular store was pretty big, and in places like that, I really do need the scooter. I can do more later if I don't overdo it in the store by trying to walk all the way through. Baby steps. But I could walk through a smaller grocery store maybe. And that's okay. I'm healing and healing takes time. Reintegrating into the outside world takes time. I'll get there.

But now I know that sometimes I CAN go get groceries on my own if I need to (and my body says it's cool). And that's wonderful.